Merriment, music, mystery drinks reign at 882nd TRG dining out

  • Published
  • By Staff Sgt. Tonnette Thompson
  • 82nd Training Wing Public Affairs
SHEPPARD AIR FORCE BASE, Texas --  It had the consistency of tar, the color of dirt, and a smell that even those who drank it didn't care to describe. Although it was a non-alcoholic concoction for the sake of the designated drivers, it may have left those subjected to it wishing it did at least offer a chance at inebriation.

Even with a dignified, eloquent guest speaker and a playful lineup of musical entertainment, the grog bowl was the undisputed star of the show at the 882nd Training Group Dining Out June 23 at the Sheppard Club.

When not laughing uproariously at a hilarious drunk driving prevention video, or cheering the ultimate wrestling match broadcast on the screens back in Tommy D's, members of the 882nd Training Support Squadron and 381st, 382nd and 383rd Training squadrons spent the evening either carefully avoiding breaking any of the numerous dining out rules, or keeping an eye out so they could squeal on anyone who did. The punishment for breaking said rules, of course, was a trip to the famed grog bowl.

Some, however, bravely volunteered to bite the bullet - and bite into the still-unidentified chewable chunks within the grog - by either offering a demonstration or even setting themselves up for targeting. Tech. Sgt. James Thompson, executive assistant to 882nd TRG Commander Col. Nancy Dezell, was the first to take his poison, offering a demonstration of the proper addressing, toasting and imbibing procedure for the attendees.

When asked how his senses were engaged by the mystery drink, Sergeant Thompson declined to comment.

Several people made the dreaded trip to the grog bowl, including a group of folks who purposely sewed multicolored sleeves into their white shirts. After stripping off their dress jackets to reveal their fashion statement to an audience crowing with laughter, the group dove into the grog as one.

Eventually the bowl was emptied by the enthusiastic crowd, closed by the mess president - and then immediately reopened when the emcees flubbed their script. While the audience giggled and pointed at the victims, the bowl was refilled with wine and a distinctly yellow liquid poured from a urine bag.

The decision to have a dining out was suggested by Tech. Sgt. Jennifer Wampler, 383rd TRS, who ironically became the event's POC.

"It was a fun event," said Sergeant Wampler. "Everyone who's come to me has said they had a great time."

One of the notable reasons for a dining out was because the group hadn't had one in nearly a decade.

"We decided it would be good for esprit de corps, our team's morale. Besides that, we haven't had one in about eight years, so it seemed like a good idea," said Senior Master Sgt. Marc Schwartz, 382nd TRS.

The evening was "scored" by members of the 77th Army Band, who played during the evening's social hour and dinner. Opting to avoid more traditional selections, the brass quartet leaned toward more playful, recognizable tunes. The diners were treated to classical renditions of "Y.M.C.A.," "Build Me up Buttercup," Sesame Street's "Rubber Duckie," and "The Liberty Bell March," perhaps more commonly known as the "Monty Python's Flying Circus" theme.

Retired Brig. Gen. Don Wagner served as the dining out's guest speaker, but he wasn't the only distinguished guest of the evening. With a vintage dress uniform draping his thin frame, the two-above, six-below chevron style that once indicated a chief only slightly faded, retired Chief Master Sgt. Don Collier was treated to a standing ovation of spoons banging the tabletops.

General Wagner spoke of days training with physical therapists, and how it taught him the value of remaining diligent in the field of medicine. Not only is the field constantly updated with new procedures, treatments and medicines, but one must always keep in mind that someone's health depends on their level of professionalism.

"It's important to know what your responsibilities are, and what you're held accountable for," he said, calling for people of "high integrity" and "great character" to spearhead the mission.

"Sheppard is crying out for leadership," he told the crowd. "I urge you to give it to them."

All in all, the attendees seemed to have a pretty good time. Still one question remained on most people's lips, concerning what flavor the grog tasters had on theirs. Those who'd walked that particular plank, however, remained cryptic on the subject.

"The party was awesome, but not as awesome as the grog," said 882nd TRSS Staff Sgt. Inna Hernandez, one of those who offered a "colorful" interpretation of the mess dress uniform regulations.

In describing the grog itself, she carefully offered, "It tasted kinda fruity ... and that's the only flavor I'd care to describe."